Wait! We can not break bread with you. You have taken the land which is rightfully ours. Years from now my people will be forced to live in mobile homes on reservations. Your people will wear cardigans, and drink highballs. We will sell our bracelets by the road sides. You will play golf and enjoy hot hors d'oeuvres. My people will have pain and degradation. Your people will have stick shifts. The gods of my tribe have spoken. They have said, Do not trust the pilgrims, especially Sarah Miller. And for all these reasons I have decided to scalp you and burn your village to the ground.

This is from the scene in Addams Family Values where Wednesday and the other summer campers at Camp Chippewa perform the play, "A Turkey Named Brotherhood." I'm thinking about staging a production of this play. I'll definitely need a good pyrotechnician.

Best line from the turkey song: White man or red man, from East, North, or South-- chop off our legs and put 'em in your mouth!